Survivor: Micronesia - Prologue

After season 14, the low-rated Survivor: Fiji, there was talk that Survivor’s best days were behind it and many wondered if we would see a 15. We did, and Survivor: China was a ratings winner. Cast chemistry is so intangible, but it makes or breaks the show.

The Fans versus Favorites format for Survivor 16, and the brief 9 week downtime between 15 and 16, seems to have kept up interest and everybody is predicting a great audience for episode 1. Here’s VPTV’s very own profile of the cast.

FANS

Alexis Jones: 24, single. Lives in Beverly Hills, born and raised in Austin, Texas. BA in international relations, MA in communications management. Supposed to be athletic. Describes herself as “contagiously energetic, fiercely competitive and resilient.” Official bio says she is “a motivational speaker who works one-on-one with young girls to build confidence and self-esteem…, currently working on an empowerment book for girls titled Comatose Barbie.” Good porno title. My favorite is Two Wongs Make a White.

Chet Welch: 48, living with his boyfriend. Not a pharmacist but has worked in the pharmacy business for 20 years. Has lived in the same Ford City, Pennsylvania, house since birth. Miss America pageant coach in his spare time. “Describes himself as magical, determined and unknowing.” Has coached 11 pupils to the Miss Pennsylvania crown.

Erik Reichenbach: 22, single. Lives “in Ypsilanti, Michigan, with his cats, Furrball and Kittyfizzle (K-Fizz for short).” Erik started using the K-Fizz nickname because the neighborhood bully kept beating him up for having a cat named Kittyfizzle. In his senior year at Eastern Michigan University, art major, member of the track team (set the record for the 400). Works at an ice cream parlor called "Screams" in Hell, Michigan.

Jason Siska: 22 (like Favorites James and Jonathon, Jason will celebrate a birthday on the island if he can last till episode 5), single. Student teacher at Prairie Middle School in Barrington, lives in nearby Fox River Grove. Official bio says, “coaches gymnastics for middle and elementary school boys. He previously worked as a nude model for the Illinois State University Art Department…” Odd juxtaposition. Bio also says, “Born and raised in St. John, U.S. Virgin Islands, Siska moved to the “gold coast” of Chicago for five years before moving to the Barrington area for eight years. He then moved to Normal, Illinois for college.” Do the math: kid is 22, minus 5 years in Chicago, 8 in Barrington and 1 to 4 in Normal. That means the “raised” portion of his childhood finished when he was no older than 8 and possibly as young as 4. They sure do mature fast in the Virgin Island. Lives with his Himalayan cats, Baby and Little Girl.

Notice that Survivor Micronesia Fans Jason Siska and Erik Reichenbach are both 22 year old Midwest college students who live with two cats. After the series, I think Jason and Baby and Little Girl and Erik and Furrball and Kittyfizzle should have a play-date.

Joel Anderson: 32, married, two children. Firefighter for the city of Phoenix, lives in Avondale. Favorite sport is Greco-Roman wrestling. Has two Labrador retrievers, Turbo and Thunder. Take that, cat lovers.

Mary Sartain: 29, single. Co-owner of a real estate and financial company. Lives in Emeryville, California. Believes her skill at getting other people to create the outcome that she desires will help her go far on Survivor. Describes herself as energetic, strong-willed and an achiever. Sounds like an aggressive manipulator, to me. By the official bio photo shown here, we can see she is her own flotation device. That’s good, because she seems the type that will wind up swimming for shore sooner rather than later.

Kathleen Sleckman: 45, married, 1 child. “[C]urrently works at a golf course in Illinois where she moves about selling thirsty golfers snacks and beer.” Did a stint in the Navy. Describes herself as “intellectually astute, sarcastically witty and a tad bit shallow.”

Michael “Mikey” Bortone: 34, single. Aspiring writer/actor. Has appeared in commercials for Levi's, American Express and Progressive Auto.

Natalie Bolton: 32, single. Born and raised in Houston, Texas. Served as a missionary in Costa Rica, Panama, El Salvador, Venezuela, Chile, Hong Kong and China; fronted a rock band in LA. Lives in West Hollywood

Tracy Hughes-Wolf: 43, married, 2 children. Commercial and residential builder, Lives in Fredericksburg, Virginia. It is going to be interesting to watch the dynamic between this aerobic instructor M.I.L.F. and the young hotties.

FAVORITES

Amanda Kimmel: 23, single. Tied for 2nd place, Survivor China. Just moved from Kalispell, Montana to Los Angeles and looking very hot in this pic from the Meet the Cast page of the official website. We remember Amanda from last season, where she made it to the final three. In the official Micronesia bio a correction has been made to info given in the Survivor China bio. Amanda was not Miss Earth 2006; she came in eighth. My reaction is the same as before: Miss Earth? Yeah, sometimes. Don’t you?

Ami Cusack: 35, single. 6th place, Survivor Vanuatu. More than just a lesbian Playboy model, but who cares?

Cirie Fields: 37, married, 3 children. 4th place, Survivor Panama. Operating room clinical coordinator. Grew up in Jersey City, currently resides in Norwalk, Connecticut.

Eliza Orlins: 25, “living with her boyfriend in Manhattan.” 4th place, Survivor: Vanuatu. Third-year student at Fordham University School of Law. BA in international relations and political science from Syracuse University.

James Clement: 30 (will turn 31 during the show, assuming he lasts till episode 5), single. 7th place, Survivor China. Had 2 un-played immunity idols in his pack when they blindsided him.
Worst.
Strategist.
Ever.

Jonny Fairplay: 34, no marital status given. 3rd place, Survivor: Pearl Island. Went pro after Pearl Island, plays a man without couth whose winning strategy is to be as repulsive as possible so the others will keep him around in hopes of having him with them when it comes time for the jury to award the grand prize. Voted a Fox Reality Really Award as Most Memorable Reality Star in the History of Reality Television. Infamous for getting kicked off of some MTV show (True Life? Real World?) for defecating on someone’s bed. Omarosa thinks he gives the D-list a bad name.

Jonathan Penner: 45, married, 2 children. 7th Place, Survivor: Cook Island. New Yorker. Along with Fan Jason and Fav James, will celebrate a birthday on the island if he can make it to week 5. Writer/producer for film and television with a decent resume.

Oscar "Ozzy" Lusth: 26, no marital status given. 2nd place, Survivor: Cook Island. Born in Mexico, came to the US as a young child. Odd bio entry; “Lusth moved many times in his teen years to seven U.S. States and Central America while his mother divorced and remarried for a third time.” Anybody sense some resentment here? Currently working as a freelance photographer and writer, lives in Venice, California.

Parvati Shallow: 25, no marital status given. 6th place, Survivor: Cook Island. Boxer since 2004, grew up the eldest of three siblings on a commune in Vero Beach, Florida. Has a BA in journalism, lives in LA.

Yau-Man Chan: 55, married, two children. 4th place, Survivor: Fiji. Oldest on the island by 7 years. Originally from Malaysian Borneo, MIT grad, Chief Technology Officer for the College of Chemistry at the University of California, Berkeley.

So here we go. I’m excited; hope you are, too. See you after episode 1.